those early days here at this Blank Forever, when I would put a post up saying that I have nothing to write? Remember that? I recall a couple of you would say that I don’t need to do that, I should’ve just not posted. Remember those days?
It’s one of those days again. Probably one of those couple days.
Actually, I have a friend, who’s name I’m not gonna mention, who totally with me last night. I was finishing up a job around 4:30, cleaning up and bringing my tools out. Since I dumped the business it’s not really necessary to have my phone on me all the time so I leave it in the Jeep. So I come out with the first load of tools and noticed I missed a call from him- no big deal because I’m pretty much known for blowing people off and never returning phone calls, this dude is no exception… as a matter of fact, I avoid him like organized sports. I come back out again with the final load of tools and notice that he not only called three more times but he also texted me and left a voice mail. I figured there must be something really wrong so I checked the text: “Dude very important call me“. That’s not quite enough for me to worry so I checked my voicemail, four messages all basically the same as the text only getting a little more desperate each time. I call him right back –voicemail. This is the thing, I don’t answer my phone -I have a very special hate for the human race and my friends are no exception… so when I call, you know it must be important. I waited a good five seconds and called back –voicemail. Now I’m worried.
I thought back to the last time something like this happened: I’m not a million, if you call me at 11pm, that’s fully acceptable to me. If you call me at 2am? I’m gonna assume something is wrong. My wife and I were like pornstars lying in bed half asleep one early morning when the phone rang, I was all, “what the? it’s 2am!” I run downstairs and grab the phone just as it stopped ringing -I immediately call him back –voicemail. I waited a good five seconds and called back –voicemail. I come to find out after the whole next day past when he finally called back that he needed me to settle an argument he was having at the bar about what the cuts are in a t-bone steak.
Even considering that stupidness, I was still pretty concerned this time. I called back a few more times and left a text. Two hours later he calls me back: “Sorry dude, the baby puked on my phone so I switched the sim to my girl’s phone but her ringer doesn’t work.” See what I deal with? I tell him that I was worried and asked what happened. He proceeded to tell me that some ex-con that just got out came to the bar where his girl works telling her he’s looking for him because he nailed his girl Gigi 4 years ago. Gigi is apparently a bartender at Cheerleaders. I was all, “Dude, I gotta go.“
Like I said, a very special hate.
And by the way, while I’m at it, this tune fully rules.
can’t. stop. listening.
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